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This all starts between my Junior and Senior year of high school. Stick with me, here. You need the exposition! Anyway, my friend Adam (very gay and very wonderful) and I were determined to be the leads in the Fall Play our Senior year. We knew it was "Music Man," so we spent all summer rehearsing and learning the songs to make sure we were ready to show our teacher all we had when auditions came.
Lo, and behold, we got the parts. I was Marion and he was Harold Hill.
While we rehearsed, Matthew's oldest sister and her five children moved into his parents' house with him. He was a freshman in college, and having all those kids and teens running around that house was driving him crazy. A friend from church, Lauren, told his family she was going to be in a school production of the "Music Man," and that they should come out. His parents decided to go, and tired of the noise level in the house, he tagged along.
He watched me on stage that night in November of 2001. He later told me he wanted to ask me out, but was too shy. I'm glad he did not ask. I had a boyfriend, though even then I was disatisfied in the relationship and was mostly sticking in it because I felt I "had to." But, that is another story...
Anyway, the night, and the opportunity, passed, but Matt and his family would every so often talk of the girl playing the lead in "Music Man" at that high school...
I started college in fall of 2002, and my first semester was plumb full of tough classes. My spring semester, I decided to take my required theater experience class, to lighten things up a little. I remember when some theater students came in to perform Shakespeare for us. I picked out two guys who I thought did a good job: Matthew, and Michael. Later, Michael would become a great friend, and he still is. We miss him!
Then, a month or so later, a group came to do Suzuki demonstrations. My eye was drawn to Matthew, but I did not recognize him because he had a full beard at this point, drastically changing his look.
Then, March came, and I had to go to the school play, "St. Joan." The first half was ok, but the second act dragged terribly. I felt like everyone was overacting or just not in the moment. Then, this one man stood up and I leaned forward in my seat, suddenly excited again. When I went home that night, and my father asked for my review, I told him the first act was ok, and the second was terrible until one guy stood up, and he was just wonderful. I read his name to my father. I had no idea I was reading the name of my future husband.
10 days later, on March 16th, I boarded a plane for England. I went on a one week trip with the Honors college, but there were two other groups going: a History group and a Theater group. I recognized Elliott out of the theater group. We had met a few times before and really hit it off. We chatted quite often during that trip. What I didn't know was that when he would leave me, he would go and talk to Matt. We spent that first day on a bus touring together, all three groups. Matt and I did not meet. We stayed in the same hotel all week. We did not meet. We went to the same Lion King show one night... Still, we did not meet.
At the end of March, beginning of April, I volunteered to be a stage manager for the Spring Performance Festival. I wanted the extra credit, and the experience. The first person I met was Michael, who, as mentioned before, is still a wonderful friend. The experience was trying, and one day, while trying to do my job, an actor picked up his prop prior to his show.
It was a whistle, and I tried to explain the importance of him not touching a prop lest it be lost, etc. What I did not know was that this actor was a plant in the audience, and had to be there from the beginning of the show. He even had a ticket. I felt the fool, and apologized to... what was your name, again? Matthew. That's how we met... arguing over a whistle.
Now, we didn't really talk at any length until a few days later. I was setting up chairs before the show, and he had arrived to help. The crew were running light tests, so we were mostly working in the dark, but we managed. I knew there were few Christians around the theater department, and when we started talking, my church somehow came up. Those who know me know I'm not pushy, but I'm also unafraid to talk about what I believe. The vibe I got off of Matthew just felt... like he was different. Then, the lights went up and I could not help but screech when I saw his shirt! It was a picture of a cross and it read "His life was not pointless." I screamed "You're a Christian!" I'm surprised I did not scare the poor boy off!
Another night, as we talked, Matthew found an old theater ticket lurking in his wallet. He pulled it out, saying how it was from when he saw Lion King in London. I remarked that I was at that showing. He did not believe me, but when I knew the date, he finally saw that I was telling the truth. Then, we talked about past shows, and I remarked about the struggles of creating romantic tension in "Music Man" with a gay guy...
"That was you!?" he exclaimed.
A few days later, Matthew asked if we could pray together before a show. It sounded like a wonderful idea to me. What I did not know, was he was using it to gauge me and get a better feel for who I was... and then, as he was sitting on a chair in the space, and I was on the stage (it's a box space), he asked if I would be interested in going out sometime. The invitation shocked me so terribly I whipped around (my back had been to him) and exclaimed "excuse me!?"
I've never heard a man backpeddle as much as he tried to, but I had to explain... "I have a boyfriend."
Pause. Rewind. I'll catch you up on that, because it's important for the next part:
September 9, 2001: I started dating Travis, a very nice guy, from church. But, after a while, I realized it just was not working. I was growing and moving and changing, and he was standing still. We never saw each other, and yet everyone, including us, were convinced we would get married. If I even thought about breaking up with him, at least one person would tell me it was my fears getting in the way of a good thing, and that I could really screw it up, and it was all my fault. Yeah, it was not a good situation.
Fast forward. April 9, 2003: I went to talk to my pastor about my fears, about all the drama, and about the fact that while I cared about this person I was dating, I did not feel it was God wanted for me, despite everyone around me telling me it was what I wanted and I just didn't know it. My pastor was great at being impartial and letting me talk it out. On the ride home, I made up my mind to end the relationship, and felt a burden lift off my chest I did not even realize I was carrying.
So, on April 23, 2003, when Matthew asked me out, I, indeed, had a boyfriend. But, I'd been trying to get a time to talk to him for three weeks to break up with him. You don't SAY that, though.
April 26, 2003: I break up with Travis. I weep a lot at the show that night at school. I tell Matthew about the breakup, and then tell him that though he is a wonderful person, I'd been jumping from boyfriend to boyfriend (I had), and I needed to focus on God, and that meant no boys for the summer.
At the beginning of May, Elliott asked me and Matthew to do a piece for him. So, we did, and Matthew, the dear that he was, was an absolute sweetheart about it, though he did get me to hold his hand with interlaced fingers (We were playing a couple), but I got to slap him full-force on-stage, so that was pretty awesome, too.
In May Matthew, my brother, my friend Rebecca and I all went to a movie...
I went twice to see the show he and Elliott were in over the summer, but Matthew and I kept our communications to AIM only... and he still had Dial-Up.
Towards the end of July and beginning of August, we did a couple things with friends
August 16, 2003: I met Matthew's parents, and in front of their house, he asked me out. I kissed him, his first real kiss. I wish he had been mine...
On April 16, 2006, Matthew had plans to propose to me. It was the day we met, and he wanted to do an elaborate thing..... but I screwed it up. He asked me to dinner for our anniversary of our first date. That was wonderful. I was really stressed, I was a senior, a teacher's assistant, and I had papers to grade and write over that weekend. A nice, relaxing Sunday dinner sounded wonderful. Then, he got worried he would not have enough time for the proposal, and had a friend call me up saying "Hey, Matt said you wanted to see the show, Sunday. I was just calling to see how you wanted to get the tickets."
Suddenly, my relaxing dinner turned into way too much for me to emotionally handle in the midst of all the paper-writing, grading, and everything else. I told Matt I had to cancel, unknowingly canceling my own engagement...
That Monday, my boss walked into the main room at work and said to me, "I hear congratulations are in order." "Huh?" was my very dignified reply. He glanced at my hand, looked up at me and replied, "Nevermind!" and walked out quickly. I suspected, but I didn't let myself believe he knew something I didn't...
A week later, on the anniversary of the day Matthew asked me out and I turned him down, I went to church without him. I did not know where he was, but I figured he was sick or had something due for school the next day. When I left church, Mom called me and asked me to come to her house, where she was home sick. It was odd, and while I was there with her, I felt something was off. She got a phone call, and suddenly, I could leave.
I was really, really confused. I went out to my car, and almost broke down laughing. Inside my LOCKED car, a message was taped to the steering wheel. I knew my Dad was involved on some level since was the only person with a key to my car besides me. When I saw that first note, telling me I had to go on a scavenger hunt, my heart lept. "Is he proposing?" I wondered.. but I forced that down into my heart and decided to just enjoy the journey.
The note instructed me to go to the place we first kissed. That was easy. Even all of you know where that was. When I got to his house, there was a note hanging from the tree in front of the house with my name on it. I didn't know there was a friend of Matt's in the bushes across the street.
PAUSE: My husband had an "E Team" as he called it. He had production meetings. This man is not the kind to do it half-way.
I received instructions to call a friend in California who I went to college with. She gave me a clue, which sent me to our friend Julia's house (I THINK it was Julia, then Rebecca..), whose clue sent me to Rebecca, whose clue sent me to the bench on campus where Matthew and I loved to share lunches.
PAUSE: Funny side note. Anywhere I didn't encounter a PERSON handing me a note, there was someone hiding to make sure no one but me took the note, and then they called Matt to tell him where I was in the game. So, our friend Ian, who is now in the military, was in the bushes with his long, black hair down his back. A woman walking by with her dog spotted him and FREAKED, thinking he was going to attack her... Anyway....
I found inside the envelope on the bench a phone card and an English phone number. I called it, and got ZOE!! She was one of our girlfriends when we studied abroad in England. She gave me a clue which took me to Elliott. He asked me "Do you know what this is all about, yet?" I wouldn't answer. I didn't dare hope it was all leading up to what I hoped it was leading up to.
The final clue sent me back to that theater, back to that place where I first met him, first discovered he was a Christian, where he first asked me out, where he first recited poetry to me. It all led back to that theater.
I saw a note on the stage door inviting me in, and when I walked in, it was completely dark. I stood there, wondering what on earth was going on...
A spotlight came on over a chair. There was a note on it instructing me to sit, and I did. I looked into the darkness, and across the stage, another light came on and Matthew stepped into it, a piece of paper in hand. He said it was a poem he wrote five years earlier, when he had no woman in mind. It was entitled, "To the woman I am going to marry."
He read it, and my heart caught in my chest. He put the paper down and walked from his spotlight to mine, a white octoganal box in his hands. He knelt before me, saying my name, asking "Will you marry me?"
I looked up at him and answered the way every man hoped his wife-to-be will: "Are you kidding?"
After a few minutes of various versions of "Seriously? Are you serious?" he let me know "You're kinda leaving me hanging here." Of course, I said yes. We kissed, and he twirled me around the space as we laughed and danced.
Then, we had to go back to the homes of half the people involved because they wanted to see the ring. It was the most magical proposal EVER. I pray it never leaves my mind, or my heart.
A little over a year later, on July 16, 2007, we got married.
When I met him, I had no idea that man I was arguing with over a whistle... would be the love of my life.
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(VISITOR) AUTHOR'S NAME
Muffy
MESSAGE TIMESTAMP
09 august 2008, 00:00:28
AUTHOR'S IP LOGGED
170.20.11.116
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