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I have only red till comment 28, now I want to write my opnoiin, even though this post is from 2006.—The question how to define rape has troubled me the last months, not because I felt raped, but felt like guys took advantage of my state of mind.I repeatedly have very low self-esteem and depressions. I often feel like nobody would like me for myself and that I always have to comply so people deal with me at all. This extends into my sex life. I can only do pleasure to my partners but have problems recieving it, cause I feel like I have to work or otherwise they will be unsatisfied.The problem with my situation and the situation described in this blog post is that the answer of the question: “Is it rape?â€, depends on the knowlege of the alleged rapist. Does he see in what bad position or state of mind the alleged victim is and is using the circumstances against the alleged viction or does he not? Nobody knows!Let me repeat: Nobody knows!If the girl would ask the boy: “I don’t want any more than kissing. I would only do more because I am afraid that you don’t love me anymore or throw me out in the night if I do not comply. You don’t want that, don’t you?†Than any more sex that would happen that night would render the boy a rapist.So I came to the conclusion that if I do things I don’t want to do, just because I decided for the other and in advance that he would throw me out, or didn't love me anymore, than It is my fault.Of course there are situation, where its obvious that someone knows the situation of a victim and uses it against her, like a police man finding an illegal immigrant “you don’t want me to report youâ€, but the girl boy story isn’t such a situation.Of course I think the boy must be self-centered or stupid or very limited in understanding whats going on in people minds. He might even not understand himself very well. That’s all very common.A measure would be to make all people emphatical enough that they sense the inner conflicts in others, but that would not prevent such events with 100% probability, because people err.The only thing that would have prevented this terrible event with a probability of 100% is to make all people self confident and self sufficient enough that they don’t do things they don’t wanna do. That is incredible important.
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(VISITOR) AUTHOR'S NAME
Pascal
MESSAGE TIMESTAMP
19 december 2014, 08:28:15
AUTHOR'S IP LOGGED
177.135.236.170
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